On my way to pick my son up from school one afternoon, I noticed a random tulip growing on the side of the road in a blanket of green grass. Just one single bright pink tulip.
I pulled into the parking lot of his school and walked down the sidewalk staring at pretty yellow and white flowers popping up along my path. I had just been in prayer about my place, as a woman in the church. I was telling the Lord how, after moving to Spring Hill, Tennessee nearly three years ago, I have never felt more crushed in Spirit.
I have always been a passionate person. Being different has never been new to me since all through school I was continually accused of being a daydreamer, but unwanted...now that's a different feeling.
2 Corinthians 4:8 we are afflicted in every way, but not crushed; perplexed, but not despairing; persecuted, but not forsaken; struck down, but not destroyed
He spoke to me through those flowers reminding me that even though I felt crushed, I was not crushed. I certainly was not destroyed.
A few years ago I started to notice something I had never experienced before , and the consistency of it was starting to wear me down. I found that as a woman, it is shocking to others, particularly male leaders in the church, when I tell them I am passionate about teaching God's Word. Dare I ever say, Preach! I can see it in their eyes. They instantly become uncomfortable when I say that I have a heart for church planting and evangelism. I can see them shifting as if they are planning their escape from the conversation.
I don't want to compete. I don't want to struggle for power in some fancy leadership role.
I do want to labor with my brothers and sisters in Christ for the expansion of the Gospel and not be looked at like I'm an alien from another planet.
I love encouraging women to be all that God has called them to be. To shine bright like a city on a hill. Isn't that what we are supposed to be, after all?! I believe God's life changing Word when he said that he would pour his spirit out on all his sons and daughters! That means me too! It means that there is much work to be done and God wants the women he designed to recognize and accept who he has called them to be and to use the gifts he has given them within the church even if others do look at them like they are crazy for taking God's word to heart!
Luke 12:27-31 “Consider how the wild flowers grow. They do not labor or spin. Yet I tell you, not even Solomon in all his splendor was dressed like one of these. If that is how God clothes the grass of the field, which is here today, and tomorrow is thrown into the fire, how much more will he clothe you—you of little faith! And do not set your heart on what you will eat or drink; do not worry about it. For the pagan world runs after all such things, and your Father knows that you need them. But seek his kingdom, and these things will be given to you as well.
It was through those little flowers that the Lord showed me that even though other people call them weeds, swiftly mowing them down without as much as a blink, these flowers are designed by him. And God calls them Wildflowers. Strong and Beautiful. Wildflowers are enduring, able to withstand weather or blade and seem to come back more numerous than before.
I am not a weed. I am one single bright pink tulip.
I will not be destroyed.
I am a wildflower, protected and cared for by my creator. And I will stand in a field among many other strong, beautiful wildflowers.